It’s deeply ingrained for most people that the truth is the best option. But for caregivers, sometimes that isn’t the case. If your elderly family member has cognitive issues, like dementia, she might exist in a slightly different reality at times. And that might necessitate some little white lies.
Those Little Lies Have a Name
Little white lies that you might use with your senior as her caregiver are called therapeutic fibbing. But knowing that there’s a name for it beyond outright lying might not help you to feel more comfortable using this technique. The ultimate goal here is to help your elderly family member to feel comfortable, safe, or however else she needs to feel in order to not be upset.
Sometimes the Truth Is Hurtful
Sometimes hearing the truth, even though it’s the truth, can hurt your elderly family member or cause her to feel unsafe or uncomfortable. Depending on what is going on with her health situation, that might not be the safest option for her. She might be better off not knowing the truth in a particular situation.
Reasoning with the Truth Sometimes Doesn’t Work
Of course, the other thing to keep in mind is that there may be times in which telling your senior the truth doesn’t go how you expect it to go at all. Your elderly family member might not believe you, no matter how much evidence you provide to back up what you’re saying. If your senior is having cognitive problems, for instance, reasoning with her and using logic does not help.
You May Need to Follow Your Senior’s Lead
Ultimately, whether you use the actual truth or therapeutic fibbing may depend on your senior’s needs in that moment. You might need to follow her lead and go with what feels appropriate in that moment and given your elderly family member’s situation. That can be a lot for you to manage, though.
What’s Going on Behind the Scenes?
You might want to consider what’s going on behind all of this for your elderly family member. If she’s mentioning people who passed away a long time ago, that may be her way of sharing that she’s sad or lonely. There can be lots of reasons your senior wants to keep insisting on something that you know is false.
Navigating all of this can be extremely complicated for you. You might feel as if you’re walking through landmines. Home care providers can help you to figure out what might be going on and whether you’re choosing the right path.
If You Or An Aging Loved One Are Considering Hiring Homecare in Largo, FL, Please Contact The Caring Staff At Assisting Hands Home Care Today! 727-748-4211.
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Becky Moultrie is Owner and Administrator of Assisting Hands Home Care Serving Pinellas. Guided by a motto to Do Good with Love, she’s well positioned to do just that at Assisting Hands. She has a passion for helping families keep seniors and those who are diabled happy and healthy at home. She serves on a number of boards in Pinellas County including the Pinellas Park Gateway Chamber and Better Living Seniors (BLS), leading the Membership Committee. Annually, she hosts a Silver Santa Party, collecting donations for nearly 100 low income seniors in the county. She attends Blessed Sacrament Church, Seminole where she is an Ascribed Member of the Rosminian Order. When not busy Doing Good in the community, Becky is at home with her husband David & their 4 children, tending to their beehives and digging in the garden.
