I’ve written before about the importance of discussing your wishes for CPR and other measures early. Today I’d like to talk about more things to add to that very difficult conversation, along with some tips on how to get it started with your loved ones.
The first thing to note is that this discussion shouldn’t wait! Vanessa and I have started working through this process already and we’re nowhere near retirement. We encourage everyone, regardless of age, to have at least a basic plan in place. That first step is the most difficult. Once you have a plan, the biggest hurdle is past and modifying the plan isn’t such a chore.
So how do you start the discussion? The Denver Hospice has a great general article here. As they mention, choosing a good time and place is critical. Be persistent because the first few attempts will probably fail. They also recommend getting your own plan in place before speaking with someone else, since it will give you a much better idea of what to ask about and what is available. Please give it a read, it contains some really good ideas.
Here are the documents everyone should have in place. These can be fairly simple but should be prepared by an attorney for true peace of mind:
• Medical Durable Power of Attorney. Designates someone (or multiple people) to make medical decisions for you if you are incapacitated.
• Durable Power of Attorney. Designates someone (or multiple people) to make financial decisions for you if you are incapacitated.
• Living Will. Describes what treatment you want or don’t want to keep you alive.
• Will (or Trust). Deals with your property after death. This is important because Durable Power of Attorney ceases with death. At that point, the will or trust takes over.
Other things that need to be part of your overall plan:
• Advance Directive (the gold standard in Colorado is the MOST form)
• Funeral Plan (there is an excellent checklist here)
Assisting Hands is happy to help you have this difficult discussion with your loved ones. We also have a great deal of resources to share, from attorneys to help prepare documents to funeral directors who can help plan ahead. Please reach out to us, we are here for you!
