Caregiving is a rewarding journey. Yet each step of the way is fraught with mixed emotions, like joy and fulfillment—as well as frustration and anger. Managing complicated feelings is important to preserve a caregiver’s well-being. Here’s how to keep anger and frustration under control.
Why do caregivers feel angry and frustrated?
Taking care of an aging loved one is a demanding role, one that saps the caregiver of their valuable time and energy. The role is also stressful. Feeling overwhelmed by the constant barrage of tasks can leave anyone prone to snapping at the slightest mishaps.
Anger manifests when external triggers arise. A caregiver may feel the healthcare system failed them by taking too long to evaluate the senior or clinical trial criteria are too strict. Insurance claims may require lengthy, complicated processes. Any of these situations can fuel caregiver anger.
A lack of support from relatives may send caregivers into fits of frustration. Or, anger can be unleashed as a result of a caregiver feeling socially isolated. Plus, a caregiver may have never anticipated becoming one, which can trigger anger if the relationship with the senior is complicated.
On top of all these stressors, the caregiver’s emotions reach a boiling point when they lack the time and energy to engage in self-care. Poor health and a lack of sleep can lead to a buildup of resentment or be the catalysts for explosive anger.
What are the different anger styles?
Anger manifests in various styles. For example, reactive anger is a visceral reaction, a quick-fuse anger style, whereby the caregiver unleashes their anger on whomever is nearby. After an outburst, the caregiver likely experiences more negative emotions, such as guilt and embarrassment.
Processing anger as it happens is necessary and productive. However, holding onto anger and then exploding leads to another form of anger: volcanic anger. Conversely, passive-aggressive anger conceals underlying emotions; although, caregivers send subtle cues to others about their true feelings.
Other caregivers may project their anger onto innocent people. These individuals are afraid to express their anger directly to the person who caused it, thereby maintaining the relationship. Projecting anger can lead to guilt and damage the relationship with the person receiving the anger.
Why do caregivers avoid talking about anger?
Anger can be a motivating emotion, but talking about caregiver anger is usually filled with shame. Caregivers judge themselves for experiencing it and silence themselves. Anger may even be mistaken for abuse—which it is not. But until it is resolved, anger keeps rearing its ugly head.
How do caregivers manage anger and frustration?
1. Process the Anger
Dig down to the root of what is responsible for the caregiver anger. Fatigue, fear, and isolation are common causes of this strong emotion. Identifying the source of the anger can be achieved with the help of a therapist who specializes in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).
Through sessions of CBT, the caregiver learns to recognize their negative thoughts and understand how they influence their behaviors and feelings. A qualified therapist works with the caregiver to help reframe their negative thought processes into healthier, more productive ones.
A DIY approach to CBT involves keeping a log of situations that trigger anger. A pattern may appear as the caregiver keeps track of their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. For instance, a caregiver who is impatient with a senior may feel she has failed her. Reframe these thoughts.
2. Accept Anger Without Judgement
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is another useful form of therapy to manage caregiver anger. The key is to accept what can’t be changed and adjust what can be adjusted. A caregiver who feels anger due to loneliness, for example, might socialize with friends once a month.
Attending therapy sessions, however, only adds to the heap of responsibilities on a caregiver’s full plate. Alternative options are available, such as teletherapy, which saves time driving to and from the therapist’s office. CBT workbooks on anger and books on self-compassion are also helpful.
3. Join a Support Group
Other caregivers who also experience anger can offer an empathetic ear. Caregiver support groups are safe spaces to express overwhelming negative feelings, share stories, and receive tips on coping. Joining a community of likeminded people reduces social isolation and the anger that accompanies it.
Feeling angry and frustrated is normal during the caregiving experience. Caregivers are encouraged to practice self-compassion and forgive themselves for their outbursts. However, caregivers who repeatedly lose control as a result of their frustration should seek support and respite care.
Respite care offers family caregivers a break from their rigorous, 24/7 responsibility. Professional respite caregivers from Assisting Hands Home Care step in and provide quality care as the family caregiver socializes with friends, receives a medical checkup, or takes a vacation.
By focusing on themselves, family caregivers are better able to manage their overwhelming feelings. Respite care gives them the break they need to return to caregiving with a renewed outlook and greater focus. Our home care agency offers dependable respite care that prioritizes seniors’ well-being.
The responsibilities our caregivers undertake include healthy meal preparation, grocery shopping, and light housekeeping. We give seniors timely medication reminders and drive them to the doctor’s office for appointments. Transfer assistance and mobility assistance are also provided.
Respite caregivers serve as pleasant companions who take older adults on outings, play stimulating games, or simply hold conversations. We are a valuable social outlet for the elderly. Our companionship enriches the social lives of the seniors we are privileged to serve.
By regularly incorporating respite care into a senior’s care plan, family caregivers are less prone to angry outbursts and more likely to benefit from opportunities to relax and unwind. Our licensed, bonded, and insured caregivers are experienced in elder care, so families enjoy peace of mind.
Complement your aging loved one’s care plan with respite care from Assisting Hands Home Care, serving residents in Broward County, FL and the surrounding areas. You’ll not only enhance the senior’s quality of life but yours, too.
Call our office at (954) 859-2271 today to learn more about our highly rated senior home care services.
